St Patrick’s Day: Good Natured Fun Or Celebration of First European Holocaust?


Somewhere in the middle of the 3rd century BCE in a part of Ancient Greece called Syracuse a man named Archimedes was about to have a bath.  He stepped into the bath and as he was doing so, all at once, a rush came over him.  You see, Archimedes was a scientist, mathematician and philosopher who had dedicated his life to figuring out complex problems.

He realized, as he put his body into the water, that the water started to rise.  I am sure he had realized this before, but this time it was different. All in one moment it made sense to him.  The volume of the displaced water must be equal to that of the volume of the body placed inside of it.

Knowing this information made it possible to check the purity of gold, precisely measure irregular objects and a slew of other things that he realized would quite literally change the world.  So excited was Archimedes that he instantly jumped out of the bathtub, ran naked into the streets of Syracuse, and shouted “Eureka!” (actually, being from ancient Greece he shouted “εὕρηκα!” which means “I found it!”).

To this day people still use the word Eureka to exclaim great joy in a break through, be it as world changing as what later became known as Archimedes’ Principle or as mundane as figuring out how to better rid a shirt of a strain – and everything in between.

Great moments like when Newton figured out gravity or Paul’s conversion on the road to Damascus or when settlers found gold in the western United States one might call “Eureka Moments.

I have had several eureka moments in my life. They are like the beauty of nature. They can’t be asked for. They come on you out of nowhere (Archimedes spent days on end trying to figure this stuff out and bang, it hits him when he gets into a bath) and all you can do is experience them and be grateful for the experience.

I was very glad to have had a eureka moment today.  I stopped into a diner which caters to many Irish people for lunch. So many Irish people must eat there that they have a menu and a separate menu called “The Irish Menu.” The Irish Menu is a shortened version of the regular menu which has things that are actually on the regular menu, but with the word “Irish” in front of them.  So while the regular menu has the BLT the Irish Menu has the Irish BLT and where the menu has the hamburger the Irish menu has the Irish burger.  I called over the counterman at this Irish establishment and said “Hi Jose.” (he was wearing a name tag) “What is the difference between the ham sandwich and the Irish ham sandwich?”

Without hesitation, Jose answered “the bread.”  So I ordered the Irish ham sandwich.  I sat and waited, expecting to find ham on soda bread or some other Irishy sort of bread, but when the food came out it was just a ham sandwich on toasted white bread.  Curiously, I looked to Jose and asked him what kind of bread the regular ham sandwich came on.  Again, without hesitation, he answered, simply, “rye.”

Slightly confused I ate my sandwich, finished my coffee and left.  As I was walking out of the door it hit me, I had one of those Eureka moments that makes clear the answer to a question I wasn’t even asking. All at once I realized that the St. Patrick’s Day parade is really an anti-semitic rally. It was clear to me in every detail and so I thought, rather than run naked out into the street screaming I found it, I would spend some time organizing my moment of pure clarity and then type it up in the form of a blog post.

Saint Patrick is the patron saint of Ireland. He was given this great honor because of the great miracles he performed.  One of these miracles is said to be that he chased all the snakes out of Ireland.  Because he is a saint there is a Catholic feast day held in his honor on March 17th every year.  Oddly enough, while it was always celebrated in Ireland, it was actually considered a minor holiday for a long time.  However, in 1762, some homesick Irishmen and women in New York City decided they would have a parade to commemorate the saint as well as to be with one another and celebrate their heritage.

The New York St. Patrick’s Day Parade grew to such a large celebration and consisted of such revelry that other cities as well as other countries, including Ireland itself, started having celebrations to rival New Year’s eve.  Further, Saint Patrick’s day is by no means celebrated by only the Irish or even only by Catholics anymore. It truly has become a day ubiquitous with singing, dancing, drinking and every other form of having a good time for everybody – especially in New York.  It is a common saying that on March 17th, the day commemorating the death of Saint Patrick, that there are only two types of people: the Irish and those who wish they were Irish.

But as I walked out of this diner I realized that the joviality and all around merriment going on is part of something much larger and much more nefarious than simply celebrating a Saint or even than just a good natured party for people to enjoy.  Who is this Saint Patrick? Why no rye bread?

Well, Saint Patrick, as I said before, chased all the snakes out of Ireland.  There is a problem here though.  Experts conclude that at no post glacial time has there ever been any snakes in Ireland. So what was it that St. Patrick chased out of Ireland if it wasn’t snakes?  The simple answer: The Jews.  That’s right, Saint Patrick committed an anti-Semitic campaign to forcefully remove all the Jews from Ireland.  This is why the Irish will not serve rye bread!

Further, for a long time, in Ireland, I believe they celebrated this day commemorating what was, in effect, the first post Christian European purge of the Jews, quite openly.  However, with the mass immigration to New York the Irish had to keep quiet about their little holocaust. As everyone knows, pissing off the Jews is a no no here. Even prominent black leaders like Jesse Jackson have referred to it as “Hymie Town.”

So in 1762 the Irish, wanting to celebrate their genocide in their new found city but not wanting to incur the wrath of the Jews, tried to think of something other than Jews that couldn’t be found in Ireland. Their answer: snakes.  Thus, the story of Saint Patrick purging Ireland of its Jewish population was changing to a story of Saint Patrick purging the snake population.  The iconic leprechaun was implanted with certain features to remind the Irish of the true meaning of the day, i.e., lusting after pots of gold, being short, etc. and also was given to wishing people a happy Saint Patrick’s Day while giving a wink as if to say “yeah, because Saint Patrick chased out all the filthy snakes nudge nudge wink wink.”

Here are some photos of leprechauns saying “thank god we got rid of those filthy snakes” but giving a subtle hint to the real reason for the holiday.













Also, here are some people celebrating the Saint Patrick Day parade:



Does it look familiar?  Of course it does. As I mentioned earlier in this post, Saint Patrick’s Day is no longer just for the Irish, the same holds true for antisemitism and genocide.

This guy certainly gets it and he isn’t a bit Irish:


Further, there is always the wink. That wink that says; “Yeah, we’re celebrating ridding Ireland of snakes alright. My arse! We got every single Jew off the island.”  Again, look at the leprechauns’ wink and this photo of Hamid Karzi, another man who is no friend of the Jew, celebrating Saint Patrick’s day:


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Joy in the eradication of the Jewish population is so great that even THIS guy celebrates Saint Patrick’s day. Remember, on March 17th there are only two types of people: the Irish and those who wish they were Irish.

As for some kind of proof that an ancient civilization of Jews once lived in Ireland only to be either chased out or possibly murdered, I have two words for you. CORNED BEEF.  This is why, as I mentioned above, St. Patrick’s day was only a minor holiday in Ireland until the Irish emigrated to New York. When they showed up and saw the Jews serving corned beef on rye it struck a note deep within the Irish. They didn’t even understand why.


Katz’s Corned Beef. No Cabbage, Only Truth.

Of course, as history is written by the winners, they naturally thought of corned beef as an Irish phenomena, but seeing it there, in its natural state, on rye bread the Irish knew something had to be done!  They needed to do two things. Start celebrating the destruction of the Irish Jews by Saint Patrick and eradicate rye bread from their menus (hence my Irish ham sandwich).

There is but one question remaining, why choose to make snakes into ersatz Jews. The answer to that question, however, is as clear as the nose of my Jewish face.

In a book which was used as a propaganda tool against the Jewish people all over Europe and later recognized to be a complete fake, The Protocols of the Learned Elders of Zion, in Protocol III, we get this image:


The book was said to be a guide book outlining the Jewish plot for world domination.  It was presented as having been discovered and showing proof that the Jews had actually written out their nefarious plans for a new world order that were only before guessed at by European Christians.  The following quote, ostensibly by some wise Zionist Rabbi, but actually by some lunatic, accompanies the above photo.

“These learned men decided by peaceful means to conquer the world for Zion with the slyness of the Symbolic Snake, whose head was to represent those who have been initiated into the plans of the Jewish administration, and the body of the Snake to represent the Jewish people”

There you have it. Saint Patrick is a saint because he eradicated all the Irish Jews.  He was celebrated for this until the Irish got to New York and had to stop because of the Jewish population in their new home.  Unhappy about being confronted with the truth about corned beef the Irish reinstated and made larger than ever their annual party to celebrate the first post Christian European Holocaust as well as removing rye bread from all Irish dishes. They did this subtly by claiming that St. Patrick actually chased the snakes out of Ireland, while leaving enough hints through the winking leprechauns and the decision to use the image of the snake to clue in those in the know as to the real, anti-Semitic meaning.

If not for my lunch today and my informative waiter Jose I would never have had my Archimedes like eureka moment and might have gone on ignorant of the true meaning of Saint Patrick’s Day.

Remember Jews, even (or maybe especially) when it seems like something is just good, harmless fun it is always really about killing you or celebrating killing your ancestors. If Judaism has taught us nothing else it is that all holidays must be about our people being murdered.  I mean even Hanukkah and our Halloween, Purim, is about people killing us. You must be ever vigilant and “never forget.”

Woody Allen was right when he said “just because everyone is out to get me doesn’t mean I’m paranoid.”  And while it may seem like simple folksy wisdom, there is much truth in the saying that those who forget the past are doomed to repeat it.

I am always happy for the wonderful feeling of a eureka moment, though this one has left me nervous.  You just wait. Wait and watch. Every Saint Patrick’s Day the Irish put stuff in our bagels to make them green. As of yet I don’t know what it is (poison, mind control, something that counter-indicates our anti-anxiety meds? Who knows?! So be safe and be cautious on March 17th


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  1. critobulus:

    Haha, this time I actually spit a little up while reading. Really great stuff.

    By the way, Jose should know that Jews wouldn’t eat that ham sandwich regardless of whether it’s on white or rye, the ham alone should be enough to make it non-kosher. In this regard, you didn’t tell us what kind of cheese you take on your ham sandwiches… seething a kid in its mother’s milk, you bastard.


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